Stop It!
By Thomas Davis, CRNA, MAE, Lt. Col (ret)
Follow @procrnatom on Twitter
Al Franken to resign… New York times
Moore says it (abuse) didn’t happen… The Daily News
Matt Lauer…axed New York Post
Over the past few months the headlines in the news have been filled with stories of abuse of power related to sexual harassment in the workplace. Victims sense that now is the right time and the support structure is finally in place for them to step forward and tell their stories and be believed. Many high profile perpetrators have been held accountable and the culture of the workplace is starting to change.
Bullying is a less sensational form of harassment that plagues the American workplace and it can have equally devastating effects on workers. In some cases, the designated leader is the bully with a heavy hand that is used to micromanage, complete with stiff consequences for offenders. In other cases, the weak leader turns a blind eye while the dominant team member abuses co-workers. Regardless of who is doing the bullying, a culture where abuse exists is toxic and will ruin the morale and productivity of the entire group.
Every system is perfectly designed to produce the results it gets.
We think of a bully as the tough guy who controls the playground by punching the little guys in the nose. The same schoolyard abuse in the workplace is more expansive and includes any activity in which one person asserts his/her dominance in a manner that is harmful or demeaning to another person. With bullying, there is repeated, abusive behavior which usually involves threatening, humiliating or intimidating. Here are some examples.
- Spreading rumors, gossip and innuendo
- Making personal threats
- Sabotaging work
- Withholding necessary information
- Removing responsibility without cause
- Making pointed jokes about the person or their family
- Belittling the person’s work or opinion
- Constantly criticizing
- Establishing impossible guidelines to ensure failure
- Tampering with personal property
- Direct verbal attacks or unverifiable accusations
In addition to creating potentially devastating psychological tension, the monetary cost of bullying can be immense. When bullying is allowed, productivity drops not only by the victim but for other team members who fear being the next victim of the bully. Now there are multiple victims, many of who will find another employer as soon as they are able, creating a staff shortage which in turn, requires the organization to spend time and money recruiting and training replacements. Equally costly is keeping an unfortunate victim in place who is not financially able to leave and continues to show up every day like a zombie with little productivity to show at the end of the day. As a master bully gains power, he/she will form a team of gangstas that taint the reputation of the workplace making it increasingly difficult to attract qualified applicants for the increasing number of openings. Without adequate personnel, per diem and locum employees must be hired at huge expense. Permitting a pervasively oppressive work culture is downright costly.
Behaviors that are repeated will become habits and habits define who we are.
The onset of bullying is often insidious and the first negative behaviors may be barely noticeable. However, aggression builds on aggression and as the bully gets away with demeaning behavior he/she will push the limits of civility until reigned in. The first and most crucial step for eliminating bullying is for the designated leader to establish a zero tolerance for any and all harassment in your workplace. Here are some ways to convert your environment into a bully-free zone.
- Stop Enabling. Turning a blind eye or rationalizing that the bully is just having a dreadful day ensures that the problem not only continues, but grows. When bullying is present, do a quick self-assessment and determine ways in which you or others on the team have enabled the situation. Frequently, enabling takes the form of remaining silent and not getting involved. You don’t have to be a terminator to stop an intimidator. You just need the courage to address what everyone sees.
- Commit to accountability. When bullying is seen or reported, it must be addressed ASAP. The need to dominate has an emotional component and bullying may be a manifestation of the person’s fear and insecurity. As soon as possible have a private discussion with the offender and focus on engaging the thinking brain rather than pouring kerosene on the already smoldering emotional brain. Review the observed/reported behavior with the person and make them think by asking the following questions:
- What was your desired outcome?
- How did your behavior advance your goal?
- How did your behavior affect the team?
- How else could you have approached the situation?
- How does your behavior support our goal to be a workplace of choice?
The person may acknowledge the behavior and agree to stop it or he/she may deny it. Either way, he/she knows that you know and that you are expecting specific changes in behavior.
- Build civility. Team meetings and retreats are perfect venues for discussing common values and generating enthusiasm for the development of a preferred workplace. Freely discuss the core values of the organization and guide a discussion that links them to collaborative teamwork. Openly call it what it is – abuse, intimidation, harassment, bullying – and challenge the team to adhere to zero tolerance for incivility of any sort.
As with other forms of abuse of power in the workplace, the time is right to stop bullying your fellow teammate. Just stop it! Heighten your awareness, confront offenders quickly and engage your team in building a community of collaboration. Civility is one key component of a preferred workplace. Demand civil behavior from yourself, your teammate and your leader because behavior that is repeated becomes a habit and habits define who you are.
Special thanks to Liz Sanner Davis for editing and collaboration.
Thomas Davis is a noted leader, educator, speaker and clinical anesthetist.
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